I have decided

Already one month plus has passed and I've been so busy, that I've been detached from so many things. Hardly have alot of time for those I care for as well.

But in this time, I've met so so so many people, learnt so so so many things, saw so so so so much, experienced far more than I ever knew I could in a month, or simply within days, taken on extremely heavy responsibilities beyond my imagination and discovered things that I never thought I would.

Yup, I'm vague as always.. some of you probably don't even know what job I'm doing. But thats the point, I don't want everybody to know what I'm doing. Why should I announce it? Its good to be mysterious ;), to know things that pple dunno i know haha (yes.. another mysterious factor).

Anyway, I might be leaving there soon because I'm gradually becoming exploited for being able to handle more work. Because they are going out of point with regards to what I want to achieve in life, and the direction I wanted to head for when I joined the company.

Unless, they can offer me that job that i really want anyway. But is it possible? That job, that department, has just one single person... and its the very person who helped me get into this company. hahah.. how can i be so wang en fu yi and take his job =P.

I've truly learnt a lot, the inner mechanisms of the industry and all I can say about this job is... its been fulfilling and I've gotten to know more people who are able to help me further my interest hopefully. In the meanwhile, I wanna finish with a bang, whatever I'm doing with them now.. do a good job with it and I know I have not failed anyone including myself.

And wherever the road takes me after that... I'll just walk on to meet more pple and see more of life.

2 weeks more to national day...

Everybody go for the national day celebration at Yishun!! =P

Not that I'm very patriotic, but do go! hahaha

busy

busy Busy BUsy busy busy BUSY busy busy BUSY...

Yup, you got my point.... busy.....

I will survive

a cool job comes with a price..

you work lots of overtime, or turn up for work far earlier than you should even if you left real late the previous day.

you run all over singapore, from very cold air con to intense heat.

you sit through all sorts of weird briefings, meetings and discussions after discussions.

you get more and more responsibilities day by day and from one project, it blossoms very quickly to up to 4 or 5 projects at one time.

and you sometimes work 7 days a week... all without OT

and you are lowly paid

of course, there's the good part.. its cool..

you get to meet interesting people from interesting organisations

you get to meet certain VIPs and certain exclusive people

everyday is far from boring because you are presented with something new almost everyday

you don't have to sit in the office all day because there are times when you'll be running all around

you get very whacky, easy going and noisy colleagues

and most importantly, i think it does suit me

this is probably my most hectic job ever, almost the most lowly paid but the one that I have truly learnt alot in just less than 2 weeks.

Seems to me that my boss thinks I would stay long, even though my status there is just an intern, so i've been thrown certain big responsibilities. I would love to take them on and hope I won't screw up, but I also hope my stamina can last that long. I would want to if I can... at least to be able to experience more challenges or have my chance to lead in a project that I have always dreamt about.

All these make me not regret walking the road I did 2 years ago.
And I certainly hope I'm not speaking too soon (coz i might just end up complaining that I'm burnt out haha =P)

Well, I just hope not! I will survive!!

Last night in a shophouse not too far away...

Scary photo... drummer on the prowl

what too much noise can do to a person... =P

Yeah, its a camera and an egg shaker ad!


If you are wondering... what happened to our dear guitarists?
well, they will appear some day soon...

The longest day of my life

And there's just one way to describe myself now.... Tired.

But its fulfillingly tired. Although I was thrown some shit in the midst of it sometime during the day.

It started with me going to work, then SH (who was told to go for briefing at 830am.. was later told that the briefing was at 2pm instead).. met me at dhoby ghaut mrt where he walked me to work, i dumped my stuff and ran down to have a quick breakfast together with him.

Ran back upstairs, only to be told very soon that I had to accompany boss to a meeting and to wait for him downstairs at 1115.. and being kiasu i went downstairs earlier.. but he only showed up at 1130.

So we made our way to the place where we had the meeting... and to my surprise, it was an idea for a sort of festival that I was just dreaming about only a few days ago. What a coincidence... I just hope that I would have the chance to be part of it, if it all materialises.

Then we went back to the office, and I went back to rushing my work... only for a while before we all had to go for a company meeting. Got thrown some work to do, but that was the easy part. The horrid part came later when our 2nd boss called me to ask me to take over a project that another irresponsible staff had left behind.. and there she was narrating to me how important this client is and we shouldn't be too caught up with doing the national project and ignoring a long time client.... all that was in my mind was, what has it got to do with me? I've only been here a week..

Anyhow, I just went... "Yes".. "Ok"... "Yup"....
And was just told that she would come at 630 to discuss more.

Well, i began to panic of course.. coz we were to go jamming today. Maybe it was a blessing in disguise that YJ didn't manage to book the 1st studio from 7pm. Otherwise, I would have been so late.

2nd boss came at 7.. we had a quick discussion, and by 8 i was flying out of the office, heading towards chinatown, where I met MY at the dhoby ghaut mrt.

We then went in search for the han's that YJ and HX were at... that seemed like a pretty long walk to me. After a very quick dinner, we joined them at the studio.. which was like 3 storeys up... by stairs...

By the time I finally reached the jamming studio, I was half a dead fish hhaha..
I'm sorry girls, today I didn't sing with much energy.
What's more we jammed from 845 to 1145... at the end, I was a total dead fish.

SO, yeah.. this is a dead fish talking to you all right now. will be going to slp soon... its another long day tmw. Actually thought of meeting my lecturer.. but i shall see how my condition is tmw first...

This day just felt so so so long... as if I did so much, just within one day.
And its only the beginning of a long week~~

In 4 days...

Within the first 4 days of my job officially at the office (not counting the unoffical days at the events outside), what have I done?

Digested alot alot and I mean alot of new and confusing information
1 powerpoint presentation in one day and attended the presentation the next with some 'VIPs'
1 super long script after deciphering a highly complicated programme schedule
Did my first modification of it
1 short writeup on one of the items for the upcoming event
Think up a proposal for another event

It feels as though more than 4 days has passed. I'm just eager for the events to actually take place so that I can be out there again running around... although meeting people and going for presentations also involves running around, I still love the feeling of doing live shows and being part of it all.

although i haven't been getting enough sleep, although i'm tired, it doesn't feel as though i've been going to work. the feeling isn't the same as it was in my old job last time.. this feels more like i'm going there for myself, to really learn and experience. I hope this feeling lasts, because I definitely need that mental strength to live through this job for as long as I can.

I'm no perfect being

sometimes, i wonder what i did wrong. Have I created such an image of myself that any little bit of flaw from my character cannot be tolerated at all? Am I supposed to be a perfect person?

I'm also human, just as anybody is. I'm not better, I'm not always right, I cry when I'm sad, I laugh when I'm happy and I get mad when I'm angry. Its just part and parcel of being human.

But it seems that I have to be tolerant of everything. I shouldn't be impatient, coz that will be too unlike 'me'. I have to swallow everything down, because its 'me' to be big hearted. I have to be nice and compromising because that's how others have been taught to understand the person I am.

Maybe I'm just a stupid person by nature. So much so, that you can't imagine how often I get bullied and not fight back. its funny how people think I'm always cool and calm and able to handle everything. I don't... I just swallow everything down, forget everything the next day after I've cried myself to sleep. Because its just too bad that this is the image I've created all along.

Florence is a emotionally and mentally strong person. She can take any sort of blows. She is a superwoman who will do lots of things at one time. She will never fall no matter how difficult things become.

Me?

Think again...

I have my weaknesses too, just like any of you do.

I fight myself almost everyday.. wondering what my next step in life would be, worrying about everything important to me, trying my best not to neglect any one of them.

I go through emotional battles trying to make everybody happy whether or not they appreciate it. If people are unhappy, I just take all the blows and bombs as though it doesn't hurt me, but it does (as much as it hurts them).

So, like I said... maybe I'm just not a very clever person.

Sorry if this blog entry doesn't make much sense.
Then again, why am I apologising for writing stuff on my own blog?

Last Thursday

I just had to really blog this coz it was really such a day to remember... and in one short brief description, it was simply.... weird. Feels like some fiction story though haha.

All we wanted to do, was to jam.

Except... that it was probably not at the usual jamming hours.Of course, we learnt that today.... that jamming studios don't open that early (ok, call us stupid...) But we wanted to jam early coz we each had to run somewhere after that.

And so.. we tried our luck, by agreeing to meet at 11 at upper bukit timah for our anticipated 3 hour jam session.

I was late of course... live so far away.. seriously, I didn't know it was so far until I actually made the journey hahaha.

So when I got there, YJ, HX & An were already there at the coffeeshop waving to me and they seemed to have something to tell me... and of course, it was the most interesting revelation to me at that time...

that the jam studio had moved. apparently An saw a notice with a different address pasted next to their closed door. Well, the funny thing was that, we tried to call the studio as well as the boss... but there wasn't any answer (i mean, of course there wasn't, coz they were not opened! i admit it, we are bohdohs hahahah)

And so, since An had driven there, we decided to head for the 'supposed' new studio venue in her car.

Off we were around upper bukit timah, trying to hunt down that number 810. An ended up stuck in 2 very tight (literally) situations twice and had to drive her car out of the smallest spaces you can imagine for such a big car... and also with lots of men watching their parked cars afraid that a female driver with a P-plate will bang into them (of course she won't! maybe hx would hahaha)

But after much scouting around, thank you YJ!.. we found that there was only 810A.. and no 810. So where was the damn studio??

Anyway, it was already past 12 by then... and we just thought of going to the one in Jurong, as suggested by An's friend. Since her friend told her that the studio would open at 1pm.
And once again, off we were on the road... finding our way to jurong in a roundabout way, but at least without any wrong turns (kudos to hx and her 176 route haha)

Finally we reached the carpark next to JEC, greeted by many people dressed in bright luminous green vests directing us which way to turn in the carpark. The sight just seemed so amusing to us at that time.. maybe we were too high, and so we were just all laughing like crazy (probably coz of this, that when we left the carpark, the people still remembered us and smiled as we drove out).

We reached the place and An managed to find out from the studio's neighbouring shop, that the studio would open at 2pm. At that time you can imagine... our faces were all =_=

YJ was unconvinced and she just wanted to stay there till it was alittle past 1 (of course, it was a futile wait) before we left to JEC to find a place to eat and rest, which ended up to be long john silver's.

While we were eating and drinking (ok its me doing the eating really...), we were also trying to figure out our parts properly, as YJ the scout once again! keeps walking out to take a look up to see if the studio doors have been opened.

1.30.... 1.45.... 2... 2.05 (by then YJ was outside with An). And you guessed it, the studio was still not open!

Well, the best part was, they called the studio at bukit timah, and realised that we had just been fools... the studio didn't move after all. And better yet, they opened at 1pm (!!!!!!!!!!!)
Of course, without much hesitation, we decided to head back to where we came from in the first place... 3 hours later.

Stepping out of the car and finally facing an opened studio, we felt both relieved and exhausted from the excitement of the day. In we went into our room... greated by very blue lights, and soon to make another great realisation.

There was no keyboard in the room! Man.. in our haste, we had forgotten to book a room with a keyboard. You gotta imagine how terrible it ended up. We were already one guitar short that day... and without keyboards too... hahah, the 1st verse of lydia was just me and an on the drums. How much weirder could that have been...

We literally tried to seize every second we could in that 1 and a half hours that we had. Played our songs repeated. And even when the guy told us to play our last song, we actually did 2 (in the midst of it, tried very hard to cover up the silence by playing the next song quickly). Btw.. we also did our fastest version of wen rou that day hahhaha

And so our jamming finally ended, we left the studio, An dropped me off at the mrt and then proceeded to rush hx to nus straightaway with only half an hour left to collect her commencement gown.

At least she made it.. and I made it to work too.

You think the excitement ended here? No....

Later, only after Yujia msged me, did I realise that I had left her capo behind at the studio (good thing it was found later on). And as I was walking back to take the mrt home, I almost tripped over in the carpark that I had walked through countless times without problems.

Weird day? Yup, sure was... it was reinforced later on when hx told me how she had to carry vegetables all over orchard as well =_=

At least we did learn something that day... that we should just pick 24hr studios in future!!

its a dazed me typing this entry...

2 days of hot sun, heat, sweat plus lots and lots of walking and lots and lots of carrying.

production is certainly not easy.. but I guess all that waiting around for Mayday events to start has sort of trained me up, so I'm pretty used to being out an entire day and soaked in sweat.

2 days of meeting interesting people, as well as irritating people

I'm tired, washed out, limbs aching and i've got a good tan too but it was definitely fun and a great learning experience. I want to do it again, even if it means stinking like some dead fish even before the end of the day.

now i'm waiting for the day "they" will come... will it ever happen?