I want people to see me for what I am

Its not that I think very highly of myself, but I just know that I'm capable of more. I can do alot of things that the people around me now don't know. I haven't had the chance to prove myself as yet... and it doesn't help that so many things have happened (both good and bad) since I joined, and that my direct boss, B, is always flying overseas.

I would like to take on more responsibilities, but so far, its just been the mundane. My brain doesn't feel stretched enough.. and I would love to help more, but its tiring to also ask every single person everyday if they need help with anything. So now I've just parked there and just wait to see if anyone needs me to help, then I'll start on it right away. But more often than not, I get it done in a jiffy.

Boss B was the one who interviewed and hired me, and I know there are many things that he intends for me to do. Definitely not what Boss C has in mind for me, when he came back to Singapore for a few days to handle administrative matters. What do you do when Boss C thinks that you are coming in late and should have proper reporting and leaving work hours, when actually Boss B told you to come in at that late hour?

I certainly hate being misunderstood and being 'underused'. I didn't work so hard equipping myself with all that I have, just to do admin stuff. But right now, I just have to grit my teeth through until the appropriate time comes. In fact, I feel bad too that I leave early every day, as though I'm someone who loves to slack.

Right now.. the timing just isn't right. It will take time for everyone to pick themselves up. Only then... will I try to speak to Boss B, that I believe I can handle more and hope that he can allocate me more responsibilities.

I'll just have to hope now that next week when our department begins on a project, I'll have more to do.

It makes me appreciate my ex-manager who knew my strengths and fully milked me dry of whatever I was or was not capable of. Trying to pick up my depressive thoughts now... its no use drowning myself in self-pity anyway. But I guess it'll take me time.