dream dream dream

Everyone loves to dream.. but I think, I've just got too many dreams.

Some people will feel i've fulfilled mine.
Yes, there are certain parts of my life that I'm totally grateful for and I am living out dreams that I've harboured for a long period of my life.

But I'm really greedy I guess.

Being right here right now, I know that ultimately.. where I want to get to, is not within this little place. But to somewhere, where I belong. Something of my own, surrounded by people and happy faces, surrounded by music of all kinds and the joy of the freedom that comes with it.

I will never be able to withstand the loneliness of the job that those at the top levels of my department have to go through.
I fear loneliness.

My ultimate dream.. when I fulfill it, I'll let you guys know ;) but it wouldn't be this soon.

And in the midst of it, I've got so many other little dreams and fantasies I hope to see happen.
Don't we all hope?

If we do not reach for the skies, we'll never realise that we can actually attain it.
I will keep on believing. But in the meanwhile, I'm biting my lips and hanging on, to learn as much as I can, to build up the self confidence that I've always lacked.

My closest aim in the near future would be to turn my position from P.A to A.P
Not sure if I have that ability (there.. my lack of confidence again) but I will try... and I am trying. All I need to do is believe in myself.

Pardon me.. but at this moment, i'm feeling quite sentimental, so this is gonna feel like a award ceremony thank you speech, altho I have won nothing...

Thank you to my parents who have cried along with me, put in so much money into my beliefs and learnt to trust in my plans along the way.
To sh for always telling me to quit everything, because it makes me even more persistent in pushing on =P and for lending me a shoulder to cry on whenever I needed
To my theatre teacher for making me less of an introvert and seeing my own inner potential
To 'ah beng' for telling us to 'leave the classroom if we felt we could be doing better things out there'
To all those who have believed in me and given me the many opportunities along the way
To md for the inspiration they have given me to be where I am now

Suddenly, listening to md's gong lang feels so apt now.
Looking forward to seeing them again soon.. its been really long.
Maybe that'll inspire me further... for years to come.