3rd entry for today

Its funny how you want to blog sometimes but you're just stuck, trying to find words to say. And other times like today, when I just can't stop blogging. Or maybe I'm just pathetic =P because SH has gone to sleep and I don't really have anything else to do (and I don't want to go to sleep yet).

I love writing, but it would never become my career. Simply because for me to write something to my own satisfaction, is a very painful process of QC after QC after QC. My NUS days of writing essays saw me sitting in front of my computer for 2 whole days (other than stopping to eat and sleep) just to write one essay from start till end without stopping to do other work in between. Thats how I churned out my best essays. But I know, I can never do it again... its much too painful.

I love and hate what I'm doing now. Hate the nature of what I'm handling and my not very mature boss, but love the feeling of being able to run everywhere and meeting people, as well as facing challenges all the time and having to think on my feet.

I've already tendered my letter 2 weeks ago, but only just yesterday, I finally received an sms from my manager (I just knew it was coming.. she wouldn't keep silent for long, because she knows I would just leave). She's not asking me to stay because she knows my heart is not in doing such work.. but she's asking me to extend my working period until a certain event that is truly crucial to the company.

I'm not that hardhearted (even though I haven't replied her because I need to consider), but I'm not stupid either. I know she can help me clinch a new job in the place that I want.. so probably helping her tide through her hard time would help me in return? It might be materialistic of me to think this way but I know, I have truly given much more than I have been paid for (in money and in appreciation) the last half a year. She knows it too.

I will think it through. I still need a job anyway, until I find a new one. But at least, I'm not bonded no matter what. Its better not to lose a friend, especially in a small industry like this.