its just a call!

why do I always make a big fuss out of making a phonecall?

Its my self assumed phonecall phobia. well, something I coined myself but I don't know how it came about either.

if there can be fear of heights, fear of water, fear of enclosed spaces, fear of certain foods, why not fear of phonecalls?

I just hate to call people up, especially strangers. Its not something as simple as a hate.. but more of a fear too. I can email, I can sms but not talk on the phone to strangers, especially if I have to take the initiative.

I've always known that I'm a weird person. Whats so scary about making a call to somebody you don't know? If you really put this question to me, I probably can't answer you as well.

Each time I need to make a call, I always have to psyche myself up, imagine how the whole conversation should start and carry on, before I dial the number.

But before I even try to pick up the phone, I spend the whole day thinking about the fact that I need to make a phonecall. (amazing ya?!)

After I dial the number, my heart thumps as the phone rings before the person on the other line picks it up and I go about what I have rehearsed so many times in my head.
"Hi, are you abc? I'm florence, blah blah blah... you know about the blah blah? Yup.. blah blah....."

When the call ends, *phew*... the challenge of my life ends too.

Seriously, you may think, its just a phone call! Whats so hard about that?
But you are looking at a person who never makes a call to complain about anything, never makes a call to make enquiries of any sort, never makes a call to ask for assistance in any sort, never makes a call to even make bookings for restaurants or ktv.
How have I gotten about my life all this while then?

email and sms, irc and msn (without these technologies, I'll probably have pulled out all my hair by now)

Yet, when there's no email, I'll still have to call.. like what I'm supposed to do today if I want to get an attachment soon.

If you know any psychiatrist who can help me treat this phonecall phobia, just drop me a note. I really need it right now.